Quentin,
I appologise for the delay in addressing this. There is an undocumented option called GEODATA_USAGE which by default I set to NONE to suppress all the ECW SDK code to write coordinate systems. I do this because I prefer my own coordinate system writer for jpeg2000.
But if you set this to GML, the ECW SDK will be used to write ECW SDK style GML headers.
eg.
gdal_translate -of JP2ECW -co PROJ=GEODETIC -co DATUM=WGS84 1.tif out.jp2 -co GEODATA_USAGE=GML
In some cases you might even find you have to use the GEOJP2=OFF and GMLJP2=OFF creation options to supress GDAL's own coordinate system writers.
I'm hesitant to document this special option though as I think any documentation I prepare is going to be confusing to many users. I suppose though, I should remove the PROJ and DATUM creation options from the JP2ECW driver then.